Attack of the Girly Sleepovers
by Standard Nerds
Summary: Behold! What happens at a sleepover with the Cullens... and Victoria of course! ONE-SHOT.


_A/n_

_Hope you like this one shot we got bored… very bored…_

_Disclaimer;__ we don't own twilight, new moon, eclipse, breaking dawn, shake away, the squirty cream in a can in our fridge, jedward (we are glad of this), dodos, my socks (oh wait…), the world (but in 2 years who will be laughing then hmm?!) __**but**__ windows live 7 was our idea…_

**Attack of the girly sleepovers!**

I don't see what the problem was really, just because for the past couple of months I've been trying to kill her, it doesn't mean we can't have some fun.

~ _Victoria_

_Edward POV_

"So, if your going away this weekend, can I kidnap Bella?" Alice just wont shut up about mine and Emmett's hunting trip this weekend, aw, forget it,

"Sure Alice, she's all yours, just don't do anything stupid, ok?"

"Depends on your view of stupid."

"Do you want Bella or what?"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just leave already."

"If I come back and Bella's been hit by a truck or something, I am going to rip you up into tiny, bite sized chunks."

"She's tiny enough already."

"Shut up, Emmett!" And with that, he flew across the river and into the nearest tree.

"Ouch, Alice! That hurt!"

"Serves you right!" She screamed at Emmett "I'll call you if anything goes wrong." And with that she ran back into the house, no doubt preparing for her sleepover, or as Bella would call it, torture with added pink.

Emmett POV

"Come on, bro! Hurry up." I said as I drained my second deer. "What's taking you so long? The grizzlies wont be here all day!" I joked,

"Yes they will Emmett!" Edward shouted back, "I just gotta get something!" I heard a phone ringing. Not again.

"Stop phoning Alice, Bella will be fine, at least until I get back…" I laughed evily.

"If Bella was fine, Alice would pick up, I need to know what's going on!"

"Its 2am, don't you think Alice has better things to do?" there was no way I was letting him get away.

"Yes, but Alice always picks up her phone." And with that he was gone.

"Hey, wait up Edward!"

Alice POV

8 hours earlier…

"Do I have to, Alice?" Bella complained, again.

"Yes, you do. Now come on! We don't have all night!"

"Yes, we do."

Then I had a vision.

Why was I tied to a chair?

_What was Victoria doing here?_

_And why was Bella __**laughing**__?_

I guess my visions were jacked up again, because then I had another one.

_Bella just had a makeover and she was happy._

_Then there was a howl and the vision went blank._

Weird.

"OK, what sort of horrible things are we going to do now?" Bella asked

"Makeovers!" I said enthusiastically, and Bella groaned. Yep. Definitely jacked up. Then I smelled it. Maybe my visions weren't jacked up after all. Yay. I'm always right! Oh, wait. This means Victoria's coming and I'm going to end up tied to a chair. Damn it!

"Bella, where's my phone?" I asked

"Victoria has it." She answered, cheerfully.

"WHAT?!"

"Oh, sorry, did I forget to tell you I invited her? She's real fun when she's not being some evil vampire killing machine."

"WHAT?!"

"Don't make me repeat myself, Alice. I know you heard me, you're just denying it." Seconds later, my vision was complete. I was tied to a chair and Victoria and Bella were giving each other makeovers. And then I remembered what Edward said this morning. Oh, crap. I'll miss being in one piece.

Bella POV

2 hours later…

"Yes Alice, for the hundredth time, I know Edward is going to kill you. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised if he burns down a few small villages, but right now, I couldn't care less."

"If he dare touches my wardrobe…"

"Can it, Alice!" I screamed. Would she never shut up?

"Fine. Hey, I can't see anything. I think Jacob has come for a visit."

"At 8 o clock?"

"I think he heard shortie screaming." We laughed, Alice growled.

"What's with psychic leeches screaming? And why in hell is crazy redhead here?!"

"Girly sleepovers, you know makeovers, gossip, you must have had one!"

"No…" he said, slightly confused,

"Well then, this will be your first!" I said as Victoria tied him next to Alice.

"Oh s***. Bella, what the hells going on,

"Well, Alice kidnapped me but Vicky's loads more fun, so we've kidnapped Alice, and now we have you too!"

"Make him over! Make him over!" Alice called.

"Why Alice, why?" I asked her.

"Well if I'm gonna be tied here, I need some entertainment!"

Ten minutes later…

"Bring the mirror, Vicky!"

"Great! He can see him self before we put his picture on the net, and send it to all his wolf pack down at la push!" she cried. We held the mirror out to him, after 3.5 second, he declared,

"You can't show them my picture with me like **this**, I mean the boob tube and mini skirt are not like, the right shade of pink, and the sparkles don't look right. As for the go go boots, they like totally don't match my nails, but still, the eyeshadow, mascara, eyeliner and lipgloss look f***ing great, and as for my hair, Vicky, you're a master with hair curlers!"

"Well, I curl my hair every day, you get used to it, and it becomes easy as 1 2 3!"Vicky exclaimed.

"I so have to hire you as a beautician! You, like totally rock!"

"Thanks!"

"Lets watch a movie!" Alice said excitedly.

"Which one? There are so many!" I asked.

"Romeo and Juliet! I love that one! Romeo is like, soo hot!" Vicky declared.

"I know, right, he is like so f***ing awesome!" Jacob shouted.

"Did you like brainwash him or something?" Alice asked.

"How else could we get him to hold still long enough for us to put nails on him?" I replied.

"So, are we gonna watch this or what?" Jacob asked.

"Yeah! Come **on**!" Alice yelled.

After the film…

"Like omygosh, it's so sad, why did they have to die? They were so good together!" said Vicky in a slightly upset voice.

"Why… do they…have to…**die**? Its soo…depressing!" Jacob sobbed.

"Baby!" Alice whispered.

"I heard that!" Jacob exclaimed, starting to cry again. Just then, Edward burst through the door. "Oh s***!!!"Jacob cried.

Edward POV

"Don't kill me!" Alice begged.

"What did they do to you Jacob?" I asked.

"FYI it was my first girlie sleepover! We were having tons of fun till you showed up!"

"We brainwashed him!" Victoria answered smugly…wait a second…

"VICTORIA!!!"

Emmett POV

Edward running and screaming like a little girl. Now there's something you don't see every day!

"Hey guys, what's up with him, and what's with the ropes?"

"Well…" Bella explained the whole thing, it actually sounded like fun.

"Is it too late to join?" I asked, "and where are Carlisle, Esme, Jasper and my Rose?"

"Don't you remember? They went to Disneyland. Jasper is finally brave enough to face Mickey mouse! Isn't it great!" Alice replied.

Carlisle POV

3 days later…

"We're home! And we got you all presents! Jasper faced Mickey Mouse all on his own! What an achievement, we have a photo!" I yelled down the corridor.

"What's with all the makeup? Why are you two tied to chairs? Jacob, why aren't you wearing girls clothes?" Esme asked.

"Don't dis my clothes they look f***ing great!" Jacob answered.

"Don't worry about him…" Emmett told us, "He's just brainwashed."

"Hey guys… look, if you wanna kill me, I wasn't trying to kill them okay, we were having a super girlie sleepover!" Victoria announced…wait VICTORIA?

"The makeup?" Esme reminded them, "is it in the carpet?"

"Long story," Bella said, "btw, have any of you seen Edward?"

"Oh he left for Mexico ages ago…well, 3 days ago actually" Jasper answered.


End file.
